Tuesday, October 02, 2007

tagged by travis.

I was tagged by Travis and the rules are I must offer up 5 pieces of bad advice... so here we go..
This photo was sent to me by Rob's best friend Lauri. She took it on a plane. It's funny, so I thought I could use it here...
So lets get rolling. Bad piece of advice #1 is...
Ignore this sign. throw caution to the wind and do indeed stand on the wing of the plane next time you are flying. It's safe. I swear. (Thank you Lauri for sending me the photo. I was going to post the one of you actually on the wing while flying, but your hair is all messy and it's just not the best photo of you, so I went with these two instead)
Now, piece of advice #2 is a bit of a dig to Emily and The Duck, since they have no Costco. (And yes, no Starbucks either...which i hit hard before Costco.... tall, quad, long, easy water Americano these days.)

My Mum says "You'll go broke saving money at Costco." She's right, but really, you can feed your kids for free on samples, so in a way, you save there too... Ok, on with the bad advice...


#2- Look at all this honey. Here is my advice, and I think it's just really good/bad advice, so listen up. Find a Costco employee and ask them if this is all the honey they have. You could mention you are a little disappointed with their selection and had hoped for more.Grab one of the squeeze bottles and say that you just love honey. That you can't get enough of it and wonder if there is a support number on the label anywhere for people like you who are addicted to the liquid gold, but that you don't have your glasses on and wonder if they could look on the label and tell you if there is anything like that on it. Then when they are about to look for you, aim the bottle directly at their eye and squeeze REALLY HARD. Be sure to put your hand up near their face as if you are trying to unsuccessfully stop it from getting all over them. Now, with your sticky, honey fingers, touch the employee as much as possible. Don't forget to be feeling bad, and try not to laugh. It was an accident remember? Grab their forearm while you shake their hand and stuff. It would be great if you could actually try and get your hand stuck in their hair...


Bad advice #3- Allow yourself to be pulled in two directions at all times. Stop focusing on anything and just bumble your way through your day. That's what I do, and it's great because no one expects much from me.


Bad advice #4- Next time you go to someones house, bring a plant as a thank you. Only, don't include a pot. Just hand it to them and start watering it and explain that this is a magic plant and will only grant your wishes if you hold it at all times. .
Bad advice #4- I love myself. I'm great. Really incredible. So, naturally, I can't help but try and look at myself at all times too. So, I wanted to show you how I can do this and still drive.Here's a good picture of proof that I do this. Look at me! I'm really so happy to see me it's stupid!