Friday, June 29, 2007

2 things i don't understand, and 1 thing i do

OK. I'm scraping the bottom of some sort of container here for a new post. My harddrive is damaged and I am rediculously limited computer-wise.

ok. I can't believe someone gave this book away. I almost bought it, but then I remebered that I'm not completely insane yet and opted for a photo instead

now this I just found completely confusing. What if you want pees but no carrots? I guess you have to get your fish net out and get scooping.

I figured if Mr. Shife can bring up the past, so can I. There's nothing quite like some sweet Llama group action to kick the weekend off right!

Have a great one people!

Deadline for the contest to win an autographed photo of or random text messages from me is July 1st midnight. So remember, just make something up. Get creative. Submit something! Email me a photo of someone in a car that doesn't suit the vehicle. I am not above you lying to me and saying you took the photo yourself. I lie to you people all the time.

Monday, June 25, 2007

I spy with my chemically burned eye. (don't worry, this was like 3 weeks ago. it will be other things that eventually take my sight)

warning. read all the directions on the box as well as the bottle before you squirt anything directly into your eye. such as something crazy like contact lens cleaner.


it burned so bad all i could think of to do was yell.

Don't forget to send in your contest entries!! time is running out! submit your entries, by midnight July 1st to for a chance to win an autographed picture of me, or, a chance to be added to my cell phone and receive random text messages from me! Trust me, your friends will be jealous!

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Mr.Shife, the online man of my dreams, has requested a new post. Well, here you go Tiger... just for you. Fresh and hot to order...

What I want to know is when my cat, Gonzo started bowling.

Friday, June 08, 2007

i have a giant vagina

OK, so I don't want to mislead you.

I just thought it would be good to
bring this out into the open.

I have a giant vagina.

It's true.
It's huge.
I love my giant vagina and I'm pretty sure my giant vagina loves me...
I don't want to alarm you, but I decided to step up to the plate and share with you, my fans, a few photos of my giant vagina.

See? Did you doubt me?
Look at it.
It's massive.
I keep my giant vagina in my backyard.

OK, so check this out. I was sitting on my porch swing talking to a friend on the phone and I realise there is an enormous penis just hanging around (a little to the right) at the end of my road.
I had Rob go for a cruise down to the end of the road to grab the enormous penis and what do we notice? That's right... my dreams of turning this enormous penis into a water fountain is completely attainable. I don't even have to drill a hole. This enormous penis has a urethra!
How perfect. It was like this enormous penis was meant just for my giant vagina.

So I decided to play matchmaker because I'm just that way. I like to keep my giant vagina happy. I think it's really important. So here is a photo of me introducing the match made in heaven. Sorry I forgot to rotate it. Just tilt your head.

I really do love my giant vagina. Here I am just hanging around spreading my love and adoration.You know, making sure my giant vagina really feels it.

{If you use facebook, you can do a search for me, (cher sherwood) add me, and check out all kinds of fun I've been having on there. Just check out my photo albums 1-7 and don't forget to scroll down to read the explanation for the madness.}

OK, so, in other news, people are finding my car/driver distraction contest tricky. So I am officially modifying it. It's my contest and I can do what I want with it.

So, if you aren't quick on the draw like me(its a gift), and can't seem to get a photo of a person and a car that don't suit each other at all, then just do something creative with the topic. Feel free to photoshop, steal copyrighted photos off the net, go force someone to sit in someone else's car that they don't suit and take a photo... I dunno, I guess the whole thing is just funny to me. But I just don't find it tricky.

I saw this lady the other day. Beautiful truck. But just completely distracting that she's driving it. And in my opinion, if you put yourself out there in public like that, then I will look you straight in the eye, hold my head up high, take your picture (whether you like it or not)and then exploit you on my blog

Monday, June 04, 2007

Ok, so Rob is finally back. After what was supposed to be 17 days, stretched out to like 25. Needless to say, he's happy to be home... i don't remember where he said he saw this vw-car-spider-thing, but man i love it! This is one of the most creative things I've seen in ages. You, know, not including all the creative things I create daily.

This is the picture on a friends calendar that Rob went to visit while he was away. It made me laugh, and like her just a little more! Man I can't count how many sleepless nights I have spent tucked way down deep into my covers convinced that if I even stick a foot out, clowns will get it for sure.

So, once again, just a gentle reminder to keep your cameras charged up and ready to go for my contest. An autographed picture of me? Come on people... And to be added to my cell phone to get random text messages from me whenever I feel like it.... ??? All I can say is Man, I hope I win!!!! (No idea what I'm talking about? click here for details.)