Wednesday, August 08, 2007

GET ME A COKE!! do my laundry.... "hi, i'm Phats and I'm the hottest blogger alive (oh, and the only cool thing about me is that Cher is my friend.)"

Ok, Phats.

Enough is enough. It's been like what? 3 years since you've been asking me for it?

I am tired of telling people they can't have your coke. I'm done. I have so much stress in my life right now that I just simply can't focus on your can of coke any longer. It's just silly now.

It's been sitting in my fridge wasting space. And trust me, as a non pop drinker (we call it mix) there is just no room in my fridge for your silly, little, single can of coke. Do you have any idea how many times I've knocked it over trying to cram my 2 litre back in? Oh, wait, ya I guess you do because you don't sleep either and you keep me up all night. (This is true people. I don't know if you know about Phat's power to keep you on line, but it can get down right annoying when you are sitting on a wicker stool and your back is sore. He is in a very strange way, one of our best friends, as well as one of my biggest fans.

All slander aside, I can make him laug, oh, wait, i mean HE can make, again, I apologize. I was right the first time... I can make him laugh and he's aparently not going anywhere, so I may as well keep him. HIM...not the COKE. I'm done with the coke. I think I may have mentioned that earlier. Drink it or I will Phats. No, drink it or I DUMP it!!! (look Duck...2 !!'s points!! wow!!)

What do they say? 'have a coke and a smile'? or 'coke is it'? or 'here's your stupid coke you whiny bitc...' oh, wait a minute. I don't think that was so much a commercial per say, as much as a guarenteed thought I have when I talk to you...

Phats, this drinks on me.

Bottoms up buddy.


PS (Rob was afraid to do a cameo "hello Phats" bit mid post because he was on his way to bed and was afraid your on line powers might suck him in even if he wasn't actually talking to you directly.)

OK, for those of you who wonder why my camera wasn't focussed last night at some rediculous hour, cope. It says.. "PHAT'S COKE. THERE. NOW SHUT UP ABOUT IT."

PPSI bet if Phats knew I was about to post this post about him he'd be chomping at the bit and driving me nuts right now and it would have taken an hour and a bit longer to write this..